I brought my little brother Spencer as my date and when I told him I was nominated for this [Hot & Funny] award, he told me that if under any circumstances I won, I had to say the following things.
being related to a celebrity: YOU’RE DOING IT RIGHT
OMG WHEN HE LOOKS AT THE CAMERA AT THE END I JUST
(via awkwardrabbit)
what if u needed glasses but u had no ears
but she has ears
but she’s prepared in case she loses them
contacts
get contacts
(Source: rehabbed, via awkwardrabbit)
i hate when people call their grandparents weird names instead of grandma and grandpa like babooshka or salami
forreal dude fuck other languages. cant believe russian people would call their grandma babooshka, fuck that. you’re in america lmao, who wit me?
(via awkwardrabbit)
why would you ever name your kid dick
so you can freak people out as he grows up and say, “you wanna see how big my dick has gotten?”
(via awkwardrabbit)
*puts on sexy underwear but accepts the fact that no one will see it*
(via awkwardrabbit)
